Polygamist

 Today I would like to talk to you all about my experience of working with a polygamist. I know right? I was excited too!

I actually worked with a polygamist girl while working at a grocery store. I was 19 at the time and my hair was down to my butt. I don’t remember her name but let’s just call her Eliza. Anyway, I could tell right off the bat that something was not quite right with Eliza but I went ahead and gave her the benefit of the doubt.

One day on our lunch break I started to ask her about her family. Now at this point I had no clue she was a polygamist. She dressed like the rest of us and did not have one of those long sleeved ugly dresses that I still think would be fun to surprise my husband with in the bedroom. I am curious to what his reaction would be. She did however have the famous hair do that you see the majority of them wear. Anyway… She pulled out pictures from her wallet. The picture was of a man with a bunch of ladies standing around him. I thought that maybe they were Eliza’s sisters.  So I asked her about them. She said, “Oh no. Those are my sister wives.”  Immediately I had so many questions flood my head. But the one I wanted to ask the most was about her sex life! Because let’s be honest, we all want to know. She told me that they take turns. Everyone has a different night. I thought, “Wow, how kinky is that?” The best part though, is her mom was married to her husband also. They shared him. Oh it’s okay. I threw up in my mouth a little bit too so don’t worry. That is a normal reaction. That is your bodies’ way of saying, “This is just so wrong!”

Her husband / Dad came in to our business one day. He saw me with my long hair and I guess he thought I was cute. He walked up to me and said, “So you work with Eliza huh? You really should come over to our house one day so that way we can have a big bar b q and get to know each other more.” It was about as creepy as having Mr. Rogers knock at your door asking you if you would like to be his neighbor.

Now I also have to put out there that not all polygamists are as bizarre as Eliza and her family. I have actually seen some normal ones. I will be the first to admit though that I get excited when I see one in public! To me that is more fascinating than seeing a famous person.

I will also be the first to admit that I am addicted to the show Sister Wives. I find it not only very interesting, but funny. I would be lying if I told you that I never day dream of getting a phone call from Mary ( one of the wives on the show) and asking me if I would like to come over and have dinner with them and could I please make the mashed potatoes because those are Kody’s favorite.

-               -    Onion Girl